Sometimes I wonder how our kids learn anything. Or maybe I’m just finally understanding why children think their parents are crazy. Look at what we tell them while they’re growing up:

When they do well on a math or spelling test: “You’re so smart.”
When they talk back to us: “Don’t get smart with me.”

When they tattle on someone: “You need to worry about yourself.”
When they don’t share or want everything their own way: “It’s not all about you.”

When they take too long to get their shoes on: “Hurry up, we’re going to be late!”
When they do their homework too fast: “Slow down and take your time!”

When they play sports: “You need to be more agressive out there.”
When they pick on their sister: “Why are you always picking on her?”

When they watch television all weekend: “You guys watch too much television.”
When we need to get things done around the house: “How about I put in a movie for you guys?”

When they have trouble sleeping at night: “There’s no such thing as monsters.”
When visiting any place with a mascot: “Go stand next to that big giant forest creature and let me get your picture!”

What am I missing? Leave a comment and tell me why your kids think you are crazy.